My initial thoughts for this post were to discuss my secret desire to become a chef; however, after the last few attempts in the kitchen.....I changed my mind. Instead I will be sharing my cooking fails.

Attempt #1. Spaghetti Squash.

I found this recipe on Pinterest and it sounded pretty awesome. Pasta alternative? Hmm...Totally worth a try, right? Out of curiosity I even deliberately ordered an entree with spaghetti squash my last road trip to test 'er out. The texture can't be compared to actual spaghetti noodles but it was pretty tasty. I finally worked up the courage/motivation to attempt it myself. I found all the ingredients, got them home, and began the prep work.

Not going to lie, I felt pretty legit with my chef knife and cutting board in hand. Not. For. Long. Though. It should've been my first clue that it would be disastrous when I had to google "how to cut parsley" and then "how to prepare cilantro." After nearly losing a finger tip and I realized the level of ridiculousness....I decided to document it.

 [Fortunately for you....there are upload issues and you don't have to endure watching the lack of skill]

After baking the squash and forking it into a bowl, I was ready for the next step. I soon found I should've left that sucker in it's natural form. The other ingredients were tossed in and the recipe completed . If you know me....you know that I don't like timely recipes or ones with large ingredient lists....so at this point I'm expecting something awesome. I gave this 'Herbed Spaghetti Squash' provided by my computer friend Martha Stewart. Dun, dun, dun......yah. no. major FAIL. The only thing I can taste is parsley/herbs. Which I found out tonight I apparently don't like.


Attempt #2. Zucchini Chips. 

Once again I find a squash recipe. Thinking it could be an alternative to greasy potato chips. I follow the simple directions of tossing the thin slices in olive oil/seasonings and lay them single file on a tray. 

At this point I'm stoked that it's only taken a few minutes to prepare and there were less than 5 ingredients. It was flowing smoothly until I read the step that said "Turn on your dehydrator, 117 degrees." Are you kidding me? A dehydrator? Who seriously owns that....Not this girl. 

I've made substitutions/alterations in the past so I figured what the heck.....I'll just follow the baking directions for my "Sweet Potato Chips." Zucchini chips.....Sweet Potato chips.... Same thing right? Yah. No. At the time I felt I was pretty smart though. Note to self: when the directions say "Place on dehydrating tray for 12-14 mins"... don't use a cookie sheet and attempt to bake @350 for 17 mins. Not the same thing. 

Summary

• I no longer want to be a chef. 

• I'm squash recipe'd out. 

• Just fix the box pasta and eat real chips [in moderation of course].